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© 2002 Brian F. Schreurs
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“For years, Americans have participated in skeet shooting and snipe hunting, but our research shows that only 1 percent of the U.S. population considers the creatures to be a source of food,” said Mark Allen, director of the leading skeet and snipe research facility. “The rest, then, are just exploiting them for amusement, and I’d have to label sports like that as inhumane.”

Allen’s facility, the Arthur P. Dinclewood Skeet and Snipe Conservation Center, is based in Pohogaquippawili, W.Va., where they are using a $30 million community-outreach grant from Lockheed Martin to transform this once-sleepy town into a state-of-the-art research center. When complete, the center will rehabilitate skeets and study the behavior of wild snipes.

“We’ll try our best to rehabilitate snipes, too, if we find one in need,” Allen said. “Snipes are very rare creatures. To the best of my knowledge, no one on my staff has actually seen one yet. But we know they’re out there; otherwise people wouldn’t cruelly hunt them.”

Part of the grant money will be used in a public-relations campaign targeted at groups that go skeet shooting for entertainment. The center believes that it may be possible to artificially synthesize an alternative to using actual skeets.

“They might be able to use pigeons instead of skeet,” Allen explained, “but not live pigeons of course. Pigeons made from some sort of organic, non-toxic substance, perhaps clay. They could be shaped to fly better as well -- more disc-shaped than pigeon-shaped.

“There’s a lot of unanswered questions, but the technology is there. We just need to work together to find a solution.”

Allen also plans to use some of the money to lobby Congress to pass legislation protecting skeets and snipes from government exploitation. According to Allen, the CIA is already evaluating the possibility of using snipes in intelligence-gathering operations overseas.

Officially, the CIA denies involvement in any snipe-training project. When asked for comment, CIA spokesman Jay Lowe refused to acknowledge the existence of snipe activity.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said.

Unofficially, however, sources indicate that the CIA is following a report published by the FBI, and provided to the CIA in the spirit of cooperation, that explains how to capture and train snipes. The sources say that the CIA has several agents in the field hunting for a snipe to train.

All of this disturbs Allen greatly. “Although we’re still gathering preliminary data, everything we’ve seen so far suggests that skeets and snipes are peaceful creatures, no danger to people. We have not uncovered a single injury or death in the United States caused by a skeet or a snipe. That’s a track record even pet goldfish would be hard-pressed to match.

“They really don’t deserve the fate brought on them by skeet shooters and snipe hunters.”